ARE YOU HAPPILY MARRIED OR JUST PLAIN MARRIED?

Being a single man at my age comes with a lot trepidation, ridicule and outright ostracization. Depending on how well those around you know you, you are reminded of the 'irus' of single hood you carry in your blood, sometimes in a subtle way, other times with as much intensity to deflate your self worth as a human being.
Over the years however, I have witnessed a myriad of marriages which were contracted with the confidence that they were going to make the storybook 'happy ever after' series but alas!they are still just barely a shadow of all the couples had professed it to be.
I have surreptitiously pried into the lives of some of these people and found out that they were taken in by emotions and a false sense of wishful thinking. The underlying feelings were usually bordered around hope of what should be rather than analyse what the situation actually was with respect to shared values, shared dreams and shared destination.
Most of the lovebirds I investigated never really knew each other; yes, they may have dated each other for months or years but they never as much as discussed fundamental issues like money management, sexual compatibility, career/ business advancement, divorce, unfaithfulness etc...
They dive into a lifetime commitment with no foundation in place or rules of engagement to refer to when the storms of life show up as they always do. And only then do they realise that they are now faced with the dilemma of either walking  out of the relationship  and remaining sane or putting up a facade all in the name of remaining married.
So I ask all those who have had the fortune to bear the title of Mr. and Mrs., 'Are you trying happily married or are you just 'plain' married to feel socially accepted?'